{My children - July 2005}
I'm writing this letter to encourage you, if like me, you had wondered where the son you bore some years ago had disappeared to. In his place we have had someone who sometimes was unrecognisable from the laughing, sunny boy we knew so well.
But do not despair - your son will return - and in our case he returned to be a wiser, more lovelier son than we could have ever hoped for.
As you might remember, Tom went back to Uni about 3 weeks ago to start his 2nd year, and in these few weeks we have seen an incredible change in him. Take this phone call last week for example:
Anth: Hi Tom, what have you done today?
Tom: Well I got up at 7.30 (miracle 1) had breakfast and went into town to apply for a job (miracle 2). I then dashed to uni to go to a lecture (miracle 3) which I really enjoyed (miracle 4). The lecturer told us about a book we will be using so I went straight to the library to get it (miracle 5). I spent 3 hours in the library (miracle 6) and then when I left the library I saw a poster wanting volunteers to help old people do their gardens so I signed up (miracle 7).
Anth:...stunned silence...
Tom: I then went home and tidied my room (miracle 8)
Anth:..er, Tom that's fantastic..we're so proud of you...
That was an '8 miracle' phone call - and most of our daily phone calls are sprinkled with the odd miracle or two. In hindsight, we now think he spent his first year at Uni being rather overwhelmed (understandably) and is now coming into his own. Praise God. He even has 2 jobs - yes 2, after a year or two spent cajoling/encouraging/begging him to at least try and get one or do some voluntary work instead. Anth and I could weep with relief and are sending up quiet prayers of thanksgiving. He is even making his own packed lunches instead of buying sandwiches; he's worn the black skinny jeans (bought 2 years ago after ensuring me he would wear them but never did,) nearly everyday. Everyday. On Sunday he spent 6 hours in the library..and so the transformation continues.
But seriously, if you have a teenager you don't recognise, be patient and hang on in there because when the time is right the bedroom door (cocoon) will open and this new person will emerge and you'll realise that it was going to be OK all along..
